Angel vs. Devil

I cared about you.
As if you are someone important in my life,
well, in fact you are;
but I can't let you know.
Maybe if I tell you,
we can't be friends again.
You are so addictive.
and slowly drug me and I could not forget you.
I know you are attractive,
Not only to me, but to others as well.
You are too competitive,
Which makes me lose my confident to come to you.
You seems to know my feelings
and yet, you play with it.
What can an angel do,
when she fell in love with a devil?

Previous

I moved again.
Since born, I transferred to uncountable schools. Even me
Can't really know how many it is.
Can't really know what I am doing...
Since I came to this school, my newest school-
I just realized how I spend my year in my previous year.

I waste my time,
Doing some things I already know.
I met someone, somebody,
The most important in my life.
I know some,
Which I never know. Opportunity, technology
I improve something,
and also something went backslide.
I almost spend all my time playing,
Without thinking my future,
Maybe sometimes, that was the best time I ever had.

I can't analyst my life
but I can, I must continue my own life.

-Ending of School-

After this month, my school life in ASB is actually going to end. I found that, the time I spend here had some good and bad memories. Week Without Wall, Honor Roll, band classes, experiment in science... It's all good. Well I also get some bad one here, like sometimes the class is really noisy, teacher taught me something that made me confusing, and WHY DO WE HAVE TO USE POWERPOINT AS OUR FINAL EXAM??? It's so hard... I don't think I can really make it. I prefer answer and question...

I hope these 3 weeks I can spend my time more wisely... but writing a blog doesn't really seems wise... T.T =.= ending.

-friend, my friend-

It’s really sweet to have a friend that you spend your time with. I know a friend last year, when I just came to India. Everything here is frustrating, the people, lands, rubbish, everywhere. I tried to convince myself to stay here, but still I can’t.

My first day in school, I can tell, really bad. I knew some “friends” who are ignoring me now, which I also don’t care about. They won’t appear themselves when I need help, which I also don’t really needed. Luckily, I was traveling with my dad, his English is better than I thought. Mine are not bad, but I didn’t really use it until I came to India.

The second day in my new school, I met some girls. The first time I met them, it felt so comfortable to talk to them because they acted just like my friends, my best friends in Malaysia. I began to find the similarity between them and my best friends. At first, I think they were similar, but now I realized that, they are totally different. The very one thing I found from both side of them is they were very willing to help me when I faced troubles.

From the first day we met, we almost have lunches together. We spent our breaks together. We fool around together. My most precious one in this group is the one who have all classes with me; people always get confuse the both of us. She doesn’t look like me, I have short hair, but she own long straight hair. (She had many admirers, but I don’t even have one...) We are physically different, but she and I own some same similarity.

We don’t like to wait (kind of mean), we always say ourselves are the cutest one, and we always help each other out. I’m good at science and math while she is good at history and language art. Someone said we are just like a twins, maybe yes, maybe not. But I can’t deny that she already became someone I care about.

I’m really happy when she said I am the only one who can make her happy. I wish we can always be good friend, best friend.

-Field Trip!!-

Last Thursday, I went to Field Trip with my classmates. This is the 1st field trip and the last. I'm leaving this place soon. We visited two museums and one park, they asked me which one is my favorite place? I said it's the park. Me and my three friends spend the most happy time there, we take pictures, and many many things. At first I have many things to tell you guys... but today someone made my mood really not well, I'll share it next blog!!

-everytime-

Everytime, after I chat with her, I feel so good. She have that kind of energy, to let me forget all the bad things happened to me. In front of her, I can't tell what bad things, because she will be really sad and worried. But I heard from someone, "If you don't want someone worried about you, you should tell her everything." Can I do that?

Every person in my new school ask me, "you have a "R" as your necklace, what that represent?" I tell them proudly: "It represent my true friend in Malaysia, I'll have energy if I have this necklace that represent her." Unfortunately, they still think that represent my boyfriend... T.T Nevermind, as well as I know it, that's enough.

-having bad day?-

I felt really tired today, I don't know why. Maybe today morning, she make sour face when I try to talk to her. It reminds me that day in KL, she tell me that I am really childish and she couldn't affort me anymore. After that I tried everything to change myself, I hope I wasn't that childish too... Maybe because I'm the youngest child in our family thats why I being so childish.
I tried not to be so friend with her after I know we will be separate after few years, few months...but she is always so friendly and I just can't keep myself away from her. She is one of my 2 friends in this school. I don't want to lose her but what can I do?